For many months now, I’ve been keeping a list of painfully Texan things I’ve actually come across in my day to day life growing up and living in Texas. This is by no means meant to capture everyone who has ever or currently lives in Texas. It’s merely a set of large generalizations based on actual observations.
I have a pretty strange relationship with the Lone Star State. I don’t have any family beyond my parents or sister living here or anywhere near here, and besides my sister, I don’t have any family from Texas. But I have spent the majority of my life here, in Denton, TX to be specific, and by all means should consider myself a Texan. And more and more, I’m warming up to the idea. Or maybe I’m realizing how this quirky, albeit occasionally embarrassing, culture has shaped who I am.
There are many misconceptions non-Texans hold about this state. Those of us who have lived here since we were kiddos grew up trading stories of the ridiculous things our out-of-state cousins would ask us about Texas, firmly believing we rode horses to school. Occasionally though, Texans don’t disappoint. So here’s a list of:
Stereotypically Texan Things That (Some) Texans Actually Do
1. Take photographs in fields of bluebonnets (the State flower, y’all) during springtime
2. Listen to country music
3. Participate in 4H as a kid
4. Talk about Chuck Norris
5. Know someone that knows someone who knows Chuck Norris (I’m guilty of this one, guys)
6. Expect iced tea to be sweetened
7. Own Wranglers
8. Go line dancing at bars named Rockin’ Rodeo (the name of a bar literally a few blocks from my apartment)
9. Drive massive pick-up trucks with Don’t Mess with Texas bumper stickers
10. Think “Don’t Mess with Texas” is the truest thing ever said
11. Eat Pecan Pie (pronounced pee-can paai)
12. Hate immigrants
13. Actually care about the UT/OU football rivalry even if they didn’t go there, live there, or even really like football
14. Buy beer in drive-thru beer-selling establishments aptly named Beer Barn, which actually resemble barns
15. Have racist grandparents
16. Be completely unaware that certain customs are uniquely Texan and aren’t done anywhere else. My friends and I were shocked last week after discovering Homecoming mums and garters are only made and worn in Texas.
17. Make campaign ads like this one:
18. ACTUALLY elect Senator (Big Bad) John Cornyn