I don’t know if you know this about me,

but I’m fantastic at the game show Wheel of Fortune. It’s a natural skill that I possess and I believe I owe it to the world to share my talents. So, I’ve decided to quit school and spend all of my time perfecting my word-recognizing skills to become the Ultimate Wheel of Fortune World Champ. After becoming champion, I will open Jennifer Lioy’s School of Wheel of Fortune and change this generation’s horrific neglect of the glory of this intellectual competition.



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