I realize I haven’t written anything real in some time; my most sincere apologies go to you all. It is 10:17 and I have officially completely the perfect end to a fantastic week and had the most wonderful of days to the start to another great week ahead. Today I realized that sometimes I let seemingly important things get in the way of actually living. Sometimes it’s insecurity or my innate inhibitions, but more than anything, I let being busy get in the way of everything else. I realize that it’s important to have priorities and that sometimes you have to get things done when you’d rather be doing other things, but I think this is one of those things that’s all about balance as well. I don’t have very much fun, it’s that simple. I preoccupy myself with things that are too distracting and stressful to enjoy, use them as an excuse, and then proceed to complain about it after the fact. I think I’ve realized that it’s worth it, for me at least, so choose to do something that brings a smile to my face and joy to my life over being successful all of the time, if that makes sense. I don’t want to walk across that stage in June and feel as though I spent four years of my life letting school work and my busy lifestyle keep me from having real experiences and meaningful moments of fully living for living’s sake. Maybe I’m babbling, but that’s what you get this evening. Awards are great and begin successful is an awesome and working hard pays off, but so does having a night filled with wonderful people and making memories that won’t fade when that C+ I got on a ridiculous spanish test is merely a number on a meaningless piece of paper. It’s easy for me to complain about being unhappy whenever I’m crazy busy and letting my school work or my work work or my design work get in the way of wonderful opportunities to have a good time. It’s easier than admitting that sometimes I’m just unhappy and very down and the only person at fault is myself.
Currently Listening to Fly Me To the Moon by Frank Sinatra (my favorite Frank song, by the way)